Shoot

I don't really like my photo taken, because it never looks like me.
It's my fate to have the jelly face of a born mimic, and I can impersonate Jack Nicholson, Elvis, the Queen, Beavis, Brittney Spears, etc.

I'm even guilty of brief comedic skits, like Flock of Seagulls guy tries to be a gangsta. But that's usually the gin mixed with wine mixed with the richest chocolate cake on earth egged on by other drunk peoples' laughter.

So. Photo shoots are hilarious. Keep a straight face?
I have a tendency to smile like the cat who ate the canary, eyes all squinty and pointy teeth showing.


Look off in the distance? And I think dum-da-DUMMMM! Supergirly!
I just need a black cape.



Stop smiling we're being serious here, pensive, seductive, demure.
Quit giggling.

Okay, okay, try looking at your hip.
Just... move around a little.


Be natural. Relax your shoulders.

And of course when anyone tells you to relax you know it's useless. You might as well just roll around on the floor.